Who You Are

Who You Are

“The good you find in others, is in you too.

The faults you find in others are your faults as well.

After all, to recognize something you must know it.

The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well.

The beauty you see around you is your beauty.

The world around you is a reflection, a mirror showing you the person you are.

To change your world, you must change yourself.

To blame and complain will only make matters worse.

Whatever you care about, is your responsibility.

What you see in others shows you yourself.

See the best in others, and you will be your best.

Give to others, and you give to yourself.

Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful.

Admire creativity, and you will be creative.

Love and you will be loved.

Seek to understand, and you will be understood.

Listen and your voice will be heard.

Show your best face to the mirror, and you’ll be happy with the face looking back at you.”

Hijab-The Veil

Hijab-The Veil

“The test of a true Muslim’s mind is that it is always, and to all intents, strictly obedient to the Will of Allah, is constantly afraid of behaving in a manner which is apt to displease Him resulting in the withdrawing of His Grace.”

Hijab is dignified, not dishonored, noble, not degraded, liberated, not subjugated, purified, not sullied, independent, not a slave, protected, not exposed, respected, not laughed at, confident, not insecure, obedient, not a sinner, a guarded pearl. In Islam every woman is a jewel and when she respects herself enough to preserve her beauty for herself and her loved ones, a Muslim lady knows her power and her value she rejects being objectified by a society which does not value her.

Allah has commanded us with every action that is good for us and prohibited us from performing every action that is bad for us.

The Beauty Of Hijab.

*You please Allah. You are obeying the commands of Allah when you wear the Hijab and you can expect great rewards in return.

*It is Allah’s protection of your natural beauty. You are too precious to be “on display” for each man to see.

*It is Allah’s preservation of your chastity.

*Allah purifies your heart and mind through the Hijab.

*Allah beautifies your inner and outer countenance with Hijab. Outwardly your Hijab reflects innocence, purity, modesty, shyness, serenity, contentment and obedience to your Lord. Inwardly you cultivate the same.

*Allah defines your femininity through the Hijab. You are a woman who respects her womanhood. Allah wants you to be respected by others, and for you to respect yourself.

*Allah raises your dignity through the Hijab. When a strange man looks at you, he respects you because he sees that you respect yourself.

*Allah protects your honour 100% through your Hijab.

*Allah gives you nobility through the Hijab. You are noble not degraded because you are covered not half open.

*Allah demonstrates your equality as a Muslim woman through the Hijab. Allah bestows upon you equal worth as your male counterpart, and gives you a host of beautiful rights and liberties.

*Allah defines your role as a Muslim woman through the Hijab. You are someone with important duties. You are a reflection of a woman of action not idle pursuits. You display your sense of direction and purpose through your Hijab.

*Allah expresses your independence through the Hijab. You are stating clearly that you are an obedient servant of the Greatest Master. You will obey no one else and follow no other way. You are not a slave to any man, nor a slave to any nation. You are free and independent from all man-made systems.

*Allah gives you the freedom of movement and expression through the Hijab. You are able to move about and communicate without fear of harassment. Your Hijab gives you a unique confidence.

*Allah wants others to treat you, a woman, with kindness. And the Hijab brings about the best treatment of people towards you.

*Allah wants your beauty to be preserved and saved for just one man to enjoy – your husband.

*Allah helps you to enjoy a successful marriage through wearing Hijab. Because you reserve your beauty for one man alone, your husband’s love for you increases, he cherishes you more, he respects you more and he honors’ you more. So your Hijab contributes to a successful and lasting marriage relationship.

“Their reward is with their Lord: Gardens of Eden underneath which rivers flow wherein they will dwell for ever; Allah is pleased with them, and they are pleased with Him; this is (in store) for whoever fears his Lord.” (Surah -Bayyinah 98:8)

Prophet Muhammed (SAW) Words of Wisdom

Prophet Muhammed (SAW) Words of Wisdom

1) “Acquire knowledge, it enables its professor to distinguish right from wrong; it lights the way to heaven. It is our friend in the desert, our company in solitude and companion when friendless. It guides us to happiness, it sustains us in misery, it is an ornament amongst friends and it is an amour against enemies.”

2) “A Muslim, who plants a tree or sows a field, from which man, birds and animals can eat, is committing an act of charity.” (Muslim)

3) “There is a polish for everything that takes away rust; and the polish for the heart is the remembrance of Allah.” (Al-Bukhari)

4) “What actions are most excellent? To gladden the heart of human beings, feed the hungry, help the afflicted, lighten the sorrow of the sorrowful, and to remove the sufferings of the injured.” (Al-Bukhari)

5) “The most excellent Jihad is that for the conquest of self.” (Al-Bukhari)

6) “If you put your whole trust in Allah, as you ought, He most certainly will satisfy your needs, as He satisfies those of the birds. They come out hungry in the morning, but return full to their nests.” (Tirmidhi)

7) “When Allah created his creatures He wrote above His throne: ‘Verily, my Compassion overcomes my wrath.” (Al-Bukhari & Muslim)

8) “Allah will not give mercy to anyone, except those who give mercy to other creatures.” (Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi)

9) “Son, if you are able, keeps your heart from morning, till night and from night till morning, free from malice towards anyone.’ Then the Prophet said: “O my son! This is one of my laws, and he, who loves my laws verily, loves me.’ “(Al-Bukhari)

10) “Say what is true, although it may be bitter and displeasing to people.” (Baihaqi)

11) “Kindness is a mark of faith, and whoever is not kind has no faith.” (Muslim)

12) “When you see a person who has been given more than you in money and beauty, look to those, who have been given less.” (Muslim)

13) “If you do not feel ashamed of anything, then you can do whatever you like.” (Bukhari)

14) “O Lord, grant me your love, grant me that I love those who love you; grant me, that I might do the deeds that win your love. Make your love dearer to me than the love of myself, my family and wealth.” (Tirmidhi)

15) “It is better to sit alone than in company with the bad; and it is better still to sit with the good than alone. It is better to speak to a seeker of knowledge than to remain silent; but silence is better than idle words.” (Al-Bukhari)

16) “Verily, a man teaching his child manners is better than giving one bushel of grain in alms.” (Muslim)

17) “Whoever is kind, Allah will be kind to him; therefore be kind to man on the earth. He Who is in heaven will show mercy on you.”(Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi)

18) “It is difficult for a man laden with riches to climb the steep path that leads to bliss.” (Muslim)

19) “Once a man, who was passing through a road, found a branch of a tree with thorns obstructing it. The man removed the thorns from the way. Allah thanked him and forgave his sins.” (Al-Bukhari)

20) “Who are the learned? Those who practice what they know.” (Al-Bukhari)

21) “Allah has revealed to me, that you must be humble. No one should boast over one another, and no one should oppress another.” (Muslim)

22) “Who is the most favored of Allah? He, from whom the greatest good comes to His creatures.” (Al-Bukhari)

23) “A true Muslim is thankful to Allah in prosperity, and resigned to His will in adversity.” (Muslim)

24) “A Muslim who meets with others and shares their burdens is better than one who lives a life of seclusion and contemplation.” (Muslim)

25) “Serve Allah, as you would if you could see Him; although you cannot see Him, He can see you. (Muslim)

26) “Allah does not look at your appearance or your possessions; but He looks at your heart and your deeds.” (Muslim)

27) “The best richness is the richness of the soul.” (Al-Bukhari)

28) “Keep yourselves far from envy; because it eats up and takes away good actions, like a fire eats up and burns wood.” (Abu Dawud)

29) “Much silence and a good disposition, there are no two things better than these.” (Bukhari)

30) “Verily, Allah is mild and is fond of mildness, and He gives to the mild what He does not give to the harsh.” (Muslim)

31) “Whoever loves to meet Allah, Allah loves to meet him.” (Al-Bukhari)

32) Once the Prophet was asked: “Tell us, which action is dearest to Allah?’ He answered: “To say your prayer at its proper time.’ Again he was asked: ‘What comes next?” The Prophet (SAW) said: “To show kindness to parents.” The Prophet (SAW) was asked: “Then what?” The Prophet (SAW) said: “To strive for the cause of Allah.” (Al-Bukhari)

33) “When two persons are together, two of them must no whisper to each other, without letting the third hear; because it would hurt him” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

34) “Verily, it is one of the respects to Allah to honor an old man.” (Al-Bukhari)

35) “All Muslims are like a foundation, each strengthening the other; in such a way they do support each other.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

36) “Strive always to excel in virtue and truth.” (Al-Bukhari)

37) “You will not enter paradise until you have faith; and you will not complete your faith till you love one another.” (Muslim)

38) “He, who wishes to enter paradise at the best gate, must please his father and mother.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

39) “I am leaving two things among you, and if you cling to them firmly you will never go astray; one is the Book of Allah and the other is my way of life.” (Farewell Pilgrimage)

40) “Allah is One and likes Unity.” (Muslim)

41) “The best of alms is that, which the right hand gives and the left hand knows not of.” (Al-Bukhari)

42) “The perfect Muslim is not a perfect Muslim, who eats till he is full and leaves his neighbors hungry.” (Ibn Abbas: Baihaqi)

43) “He is not of us who is not affectionate to the little ones, and does not respect the old; and he is not of us, who does not order which is lawful, and prohibits that which is unlawful.” (Tirmidhi)

44) “No man is a true believer unless he desires for his brother that, what he desires for himself.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

45) “To strive for the cause of Allah from daybreak to noon and sunset is better than the goods and enjoyment of the whole worldly life.” (Al-Bukhari)

46) “Be not like the hypocrite who, when he talks, tells lies; when he gives a promise, he breaks it; and when he is trusted, he proves dishonest.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

47) “The proof of a Muslim’s sincerity is, that he pays no heed to that, which is not his business.” (Tirmidhi)

48) “Do you know what is better than charity and fasting and prayer? It is keeping peace and good relations between people, as quarrels and bad feelings destroy mankind.” (Al-Bukhari, Muslim)

49) “Conduct yourself in this world, as if you are here to stay forever; prepare for eternity as if you have to die tomorrow.” (Al-Bukhari)

50) “The worldly comforts are not for me. I am like a traveller, who takes a rest under a tree in the shade and then goes on his way.” (Tirmidhi)

Better Husband and Wife Relationship

Better Husband and Wife Relationship

“O’You who believe! Fulfill (your) obligations. …” (Al-Quraan 5:1)

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah and to their husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allah orders them to guard. As to those women on whose part you see ill conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Ever Most High, Most Great. “(Surah Nisaa 34)

“Whoever works righteousness, man or woman, and has Faith, verily, to him will We give a new Life, a life that is good and pure, and We will bestow on such their reward according to the best of their actions.” (Surah Nahl 97)

1) Negative Relationship of Husband & Wife.

Muslim husbands and wives treat each other like adversaries rather than partners. The husband feels that he is the boss, and whatever he says goes. The wife feels that she must squeeze everything she can out of her husband. Some wives never show their husband that they are satisfied with anything he does or buys for them in order to trick him into doing and buying more. They make him feel like a failure if he does not give them the lifestyle that their friends and families enjoy. Some husbands speak very harshly to their wives, humiliate them, and even physically abuse them. Their wives have no voice or opinion in the family.

2) Marriage In The Eyes of Allah.

It is very sad that this relationship which Allah has established for the good has been made a source of contention, deception, trickery, tyranny, humiliation, and abuse. This is not the way marriage is supposed to be.

Allah described marriage very differently in the Quran: “He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts).” (Al-Quran 30:21)

3) Do not be a Tyrant.

Whether or not Islam has made the husband the head of the household, Muslims are not supposed to be dictators and tyrants. Muslim men are taught to treat their wives well. The Prophet (SAW) said: “The most perfect Muslim in the matter of faith is one who has excellent behavior; and the best among you are those who behave best towards their wives” (From Mishkaat)

4) Be Partners in the Decision Making Process.

Follow the principle of ‘Shura,” and make decisions as a family. There will be much more harmony in the family when decisions are not imposed and everyone feels that they had some part in making them.

5) Never be Emotionally…

“And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect.” (Qur’an 30:21)

Never be emotionally, mentally, or physically abusive to your spouse. The Prophet (SAW) never mistreated his wives. The Prophet (SAW) said: “How could they beat their women in daytime as slaves and then sleep with them in the night? (Al-Bukhari)

6) Be Careful of Your Words.

Be very careful what you say when you are upset. Sometimes you will say things that you would never say when you were not angry. If you are angry, wait until you calm down before continuing the conversation.

7) Show Affection.

Ayesha (RA) says: “Allah’s Messenger (SAW) said, “Be calm, O ‘Ayesha! Allah loves that; one should be kind and lenient in all matters.” (Al-Bukhari)

Show affection for your mate. Be kind, gentle, and loving.

8) Be Your Spouse’s Friend

Too often, we live in the same house but know nothing about each other’s lives. It would be great if the husband and wife could work together for the same cause or on the same project.

9) Show Appreciation.

Show appreciation for what your spouse does for the family. Never make your husband feel that he is not doing good enough for the family or that you are not satisfied with his work or his efforts, unless, of course, he is truly lazy and not even trying to provide for the family. The Prophet (SAW) said: “On the Day of Judgment, Allah will not look upon the woman who has been ungrateful to her husband.” (Al-Hakim)

Show your wife that you appreciate her. If she takes care of the house and the children, don’t take it for granted. It is hard work, and no one likes to feel unappreciated.

10) Work Together in the House.

Ayesha (RA), when she was asked about what the Messenger of Allah (SAW) used to do in his house, she said: “He was like any other human being: he would clean his clothes, milk his ewe and serve himself.”

The Prophet (SAW) is known to have helped his wives in the house. And if the Prophet (SAWS) was not above doing housework, modern Muslim husbands shouldn’t feel that they are.

11) Communication is Important.

The big word used in counseling “Communication”. And it should be. Husbands and wives need to talk to each other. It is better to deal with problems early and honestly than to let them pile up until an explosion occurs.

12) Forget Past Problems.

Don’t bring up past problems once they have been solved.

13) Live Simply.

Develop the quality of contentment, look at those people who have less than you, not those who have more. Thank Allah for the many blessings in your life.

14) Give Your Spouse Time Alone.

People need to be alone for various reasons. Sometimes they want to read, to think about their problems, or just to relax. Don’t make them feel that they are committing a sin.

15) Admit Your Mistakes.

When you make a mistake, admit it. It truly does not make you small in the others eyes or heart. When your spouse makes a mistake, excuse him or her easily. If possible, never go to sleep angry with each other.

16) Have Meals Together.

Eat together as a family. Show the cook, whether it is the husband (yes men can cook) or the wife, appreciation for his or her efforts. The Prophet (SAW) did not complain about food that was put before him.

17) Mindful of Your discussion Topics.

Never discuss with others things about your marriage that your spouse wouldn’t like you to discuss, unless there is an Islamic reason to do so. Some husbands and wives, believe it or not, complain to others about their spouse’s physical appearance. This is a recipe for disaster. Information about your intimate relations should be kept between you and your spouse.

Many of us treat our spouses in ways that we would never treat others. With others, we try to be polite, kind, and patient. With our spouses, we often do not show these courtesies. Of course, we are usually with our spouses at our worst times, when we are tired and frustrated after a hard day. Wives and husbands should discuss this potential time bomb so that if they are short-tempered with each other during these times, they will understand the reasons rather than automatically thinking that their spouse no longer loves them.

Good marriages require patience, kindness, humility, sacrifice, empathy, love, understanding, forgiveness, and hard work. Always treat your spouse the way you would like to be treated.