Hurting The Ego
Almost every day we come across a situation when someone says something to us which is not very pleasurable or we chose to perceive it to be so. In either case, we feel insulted and get upset as a result. In some cases we react and display our feelings. In some, we don’t. In either case, the result is depreciation (decrease) in our happiness index. Why does this happen? It’s because you have created, attached to and identified with an image of yourself in your mind that does not match with how the other sees or perceives you, as a result of which you believe you have been insulted and you get upset.
As long as people’s perception of you matches the image that you have created inside your mind of yourself, you are content with them, but as soon as the opposite happens, even if it’s to a very small extent, you become disturbed, because you are attached to that image The more the attachment, the greater the hurt, the disturbance or reaction. You could examine this phenomenon very closely, taking place inside yourself every day. This kind of attachment mentioned above is called ego. That’s why the phenomenon explained above is called in common language “hurting the ego.”
The ego is the claimant within you. Your ego claims the body-mind-intellect and their respective functions and objects. EGO claims your worldly possessions. My wealth, my family, my house, my children, my reputation, my image etc. These assertions and arrogations are made by the EGO. It claims “it is my perception”, “my action” or “I am the actor”, “my feeling”, “my thinking”, “my point of view”, and “my ideas”. These assertions and arrogations of your EGO need to be governed and controlled.
The ego is often misunderstood to be something negative, something detrimental. The truth is that the ego, by itself, is not detrimental. On the contrary, it is a potent, benevolent entity within you, provided you know the technique of using it. Lack of control over the ego, your inability to use the ego rightly, renders the ego detrimental. An uncontrolled, undisciplined ego is harmful. It develops arrogance in you. On the contrary a controlled, disciplined use of the ego is beneficial. It develops self-esteemed self worth in you. Self-esteem is an essential ingredient of success and progress. The ego in you, if not supervised, causes devastation and destruction of human harmony within as well as without. Uncontrolled and undisciplined ego is a saboteur. It sabotages your career, your relationship, your peace of mind and your goal.
This is posted as a reminder to me and everyone who will not get offended by it. It is applicable to all human beings, irrespective of religion, caste or creed.