Who Is A Wise Husband??

Who Is A Wise Husband??

A wise husband is the one who knows what he wants from a marriage. Does he want to add a strong brick to the big building of a strong Muslim Ummah? Does he want to cooperate with his wife on doing what is good and obeying Allah until they both meet him? Does he realize the nobility of the marriage institution and the goals of the marriage, and that they require great sacrifices?
A wise husband is the one who gives more than he receives. He is the one who dresses nicely for his wife, and keeps himself clean just as he demands from his wife that she beautify herself and dress nicely for him. He is the one who realizes that his wife is a human being just like him who likes to see him handsome, clean, and smiling. He is the one who distances himself from all that may annoy his wife or makes her feel inferior. He is the one who does not advise his wife in public or disgrace her, especially in front of family and friends. He is the one who does not criticize her in public at all. He is the one who does not ridicule her appearance if he does not like the way she is dressing. He is the one who assists her in all ways to reach her best. He is the one who gives advice in a loving and compassionate manner. He is the one who does not compare her to other women.
A wise husband is the one who tells his wife that he does not imagine a more beautiful and ethical women than her. The wise man is the one who balances his love, and respect for his mother with his love and devotion to his wife and his family. Being a good son does not come by hurting his wife, even for his mother. It comes through loving his mother, and being a devout and religious man in a manner that balances respect to both. He is the one who constantly reminds both, whenever they clash, of the instructions of Rasulullah (SAW) in his treatment of his wives and family.
A wise husband is the one who enters home with a smile on his face. He is the one who asks his wife “how was your day?” and makes sure things go well with her and with the family. He is the one who listens to her, and never makes her hear what she does not want to hear. He is the one who respects her and shows her how much she means to him, and how important she is to his life privately and publicly. He is the one who praises her, and shows others how much he values her, respects her, and loves her in front of his family, especially if they do not like her or respects her. He is the one who remembers his family in front of her in a nice manner so she gets to love them, and reconcile with them and knows the value of being a member of a big family.
A wise husband is the one who reminds his wife from time to time how much he loves her and respects her, and shows her how much he appreciates her beauty and morality. Last but not least and the most important a wise husband is the believer who does his best to follow Rasulullah (SAW) teachings and his manner of treating his wives and his devotion to his family.

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AS FROM TODAY 24 November 2009 all comments to this post is closed.

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17 comments on “Who Is A Wise Husband??

  1. Ken Kendall says:

    I am not a Muslim. But what I am is a man that love the heart of a women that loves her husband. I don’t know you or your husband but I know that you are to be admired for your love of your husband.

    I write a blog about how men can better love their wives. I hope everyone that has posted here takes the time to read it. Even though it is written for men I think women can gain much from it.

    http://whatsheneedsfromyou.wordpress.com

    Thanks for sharing your commitment.

    • muslimah says:

      Thank you very much for the kind words.
      Your blog is sure interesting and worthwhile for spouses to read and learn. (hope someone who was close to my heart does)

  2. Conclusion says:

    From a mans point of view, sad to say it, your husband used you while he had to accomplish what he had to, made oaths and promises, when he left, but in truth he never intended on fulfilling it, to me as a man he is a coward,although he is an Alim, i would say he is a intelligent hypocrite whos knowledge will never get him anywhere. men when we make promises to our wife lets us fulfill it, let us try our best to a husband like Nabi (s.a.w) was. Sister carry on being the women you are,an inspiration. allah will hear your cries.
    Tariq

    • muslimah says:

      As sala’mu alaikum
      May Allah hear and answer the cries of the heart of every believer crying and asking for that which in good and to keep that which is evil away.Aameen. Very kindly I ask please do not insult an Alim,(muhammed shoayb)no matter what his character might be like. Jazakumullah for your understanding.
      Walaikum as Salam
      بنت محمد
      “O’Allah do not call me to account for what they say,and forgive them for what they have no knowledge of, and make me better then they imagine.Aameen Thuma Aameen”

  3. Nafi says:

    To be honest sister, your husband is most surly “NOT A WISE HUSBAND” may god knock alot of sense into him. Like a sister said “if it was her husband she would drop him.” I echo that aloud.may god be with you always.
    Sister Nafi from SLC Utah

    • muslimah says:

      As sala’mu alaikum
      “Hope is both the earliest and the most indispensable virtue inherent in the state of being alive. If life is to be sustained hope must remain, even where confidence is wounded, trust impaired.”
      Walaikum as Salam
      بنت محمد
      “O’Allah do not call me to account for what they say,and forgive them for what they have no knowledge of, and make me better then they imagine.Aameen Thuma Aameen”

  4. Wakas Mir says:

    MashAllah :) I will make sure I am a wise husband when I become one.. InshAllah

    • muslimah says:

      As sala’mu alaikum
      Inshallah, with your intention , you will be, Aameen.
      Walaikum as Salam
      بنت محمد
      “O’Allah do not call me to account for what they say,and forgive them for what they have no knowledge of, and make me better then they imagine.Aameen Thuma Aameen”

  5. Mishall says:

    Made me sad readin through this all hmmmm – Life is a joureny with tests from above at each step. AllAh the most merciful can give the ability to realize what to treasue anytime, anywhere. N When he up there does that, we humans don’t even get the chance to understand how that happen. I don’t feel like sayin or advicing anything, but this much I can say: You’ll be in my prayers, hold on to patience sis.

    Nothin can hurt more than distance between hubby N wife, or trust that’s on shaking ground. God bless, prayers :-)

    • muslimah says:

      As sala’mu alaikum Sister
      Jazakumullah for the duas, (as I am in so much need of it) and for the sweet simple true encouragement on holding on to patience. May Allah truly give me lots of it , Aameen .
      Walaikum as Salam
      بنت محمد ،
      “O’Allah do not call me to account for what they say,and forgive them for what they have no knowledge of, and make me better then they imagine.Aameen Thuma Aameen”

  6. In wonder says:

    Wow i’m in wonder,stunned by your kind, loving, sweet, caring,trusting love for your husband. If it where me, i would drop him! I pray he opens his eyes heart to see the wife he has before its too late! Maybe someone should remind him!!
    Have faith, for allah sees knows all, and He will answer your dua.
    To your husband you have a diamond cherish and love her, for she is one in a zillion!

    • muslimah says:

      As sala’mu alaikum
      Jazakumullah for the praise *smile* inshallah it will not get to my head and make it swell with pride *wink* May Allah save me from pride.Aameen.
      As a quote goes “Forgiveness is choosing to love. It is the first skill of self-giving love.” another quote “The practice of peace and reconciliation is one of the most vital and artistic of human actions” and yes my love overrides any negative feeling.
      hmmm I wonder if maulana muhammad shoayb mehtar reads my blog *wide eyes*
      Remember the Ummah and I in your duas.
      Walaikum as Salam
      بنت محمد ،
      “O’Allah do not call me to account for what they say,and forgive them for what they have no knowledge of, and make me better then they imagine.Aameen Thuma Aameen”

  7. muslimah says:

    Asalamualay kum
    Jazakumulla for your comment “a changinglotus”. I eased last part, as I believe that Allah can change the hardest of hearts and that Allah is the best of Judges. As for my husband diverting his attention from me, well that I do not have an answer for,as I did not witness him, and I am really far, and messages are sometimes sent to create a doubt between spouses..
    Wassalam

  8. 1changinglotus says:

    As I read your blog and the comments I feel your hurt and pain. My husband was not true to me so I understand your hurt.

  9. muslimah says:

    As sala’amu alaikum
    on what has been said about moulana muhammad shoayb mehtar, has suprised me .A doubt of trust has now been implanted in my mind and others about him, do know what a sin it is to create a doubt, cause a friction between spouse’s, to break a marriage? the sin is not a minor sin but a MAJOR SIN! I had asked him many a times (not last night but a week or two ago) and he has taken an oath on the Quraan that he has nor is involved with another women. Can I say I believe you or him? now I do not know, as I am in South Africa and he in Salt Lake City (SLC), But I am sure he and you are aware that Allah watches every every thing that we do, I am not answerable for his or anyone else’s actions, but a kind reminder that Allah is with the one who’s heart is broken (right now that is my heart).
    Everyone has been wanting to know the following questions:
    1) how long are we married? we married 6 years, wedding date 27 june 2003.
    2)where were we married? in south africa while he was doing his alim course
    3) why did I let him go alone overseas? because I trusted and belive in his love,his promises and his oaths.
    Now that everyone’s curious minds know the personal details, please remember us in your duas.
    Walaikum as salaam

    ابنة محمد

    Bint Muhammed

  10. A Sister says:

    Asslm
    Muslimah you truly have the patience. I hope your husband would relise the hurt, may allah open his eyes, mind and heart, to what a wonderful wife he has. Sister dont ever take the blame when it is not you.you are in alot of peoples prayers.
    A sister who truly admirers you from SLC.
    ps you can publish my comment.

  11. Sister, you seem like a really wonderful, loyal true wife, i would have to let you know that your husband is not true and loyal to you, as I live here in SLC, I’m a silent person by nature so noone notice me much. I know and have observed your husbands nature, sad to say he is involved with another lady. I’m sorry sister.
    May God grant you patience to bare with a man such as him.

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